storypaint | Alternative (Syaoran and Tomoyo gen)

Title: Alternative
Fandom: Cardcaptor Sakura
Subject: Li Syaoran and Daidouji Tomoyo
Theme(s): 12. Argument
Disclaimer: Cardcaptor Sakura belongs to CLAMP.

Summary: Tomoyo asked Syaoran not to take Sakura away. It was the only argument they ever really had.

It was the only argument they ever had, and Syaoran regretted it, even now. There seemed to be no way around the fact that he had to return to Hong Kong, but now, he was sorry.

It had been a short conversation, ended by Tomoyo's sudden confession. Her voice had been scratchy, since it was hard to get cell phone reception in the airport, and desperate.

"Li-kun, don't go. Don't take Sakura-chan away from me," she'd said.

"Daidouji-san, we have to go. They're calling our flight soon," he'd replied, only half paying attention. He was distracted by the sweet girl hanging onto his arm. Tomoyo couldn't blame him for his inattentiveness.

"Sakura-chan was all that I had, Li-kun. I love her," Tomoyo said.

"My family needs me," Syaoran said, feeling sorry for her. "We have to go."

For a moment she seemed like she was about to cry, and then she sighed. "Best of luck to you."

The phone had gone dead then, and they had prepared for boarding, and the conversation had passed from his mind. There had been something strange in the way she'd said that she loved Sakura, and he couldn't quite put his finger on it. He did later, as his brain sorted restlessly through his thoughts on the plane and he awoke knowing what he had done.

He felt even worse, and helpless. Tomoyo had helped him out for the longest time. She'd helped him choose a ring. He'd never realized-- none of them had-- the way she felt about Sakura was deeper than the love of friendship.

"I love her," Tomoyo had told him desperately, her best-kept secret, trying her best to get them to stay. He had taken her words and tossed them away. He knew she loved Sakura; everyone did. But no one knew how deeply.

If they had stayed, what then? Would Tomoyo have lived her life as second in Sakura's life, content just to see her face? It would have tortured Syaoran to be in her place. He couldn't have done it.

He regretted the argument when he was omitted from Tomoyo's wedding invitation. She was marrying a man she'd never met, for the sake of the business. The invitation had come addressed to Sakura only, and though his wife insisted that Tomoyo must have slipped and forgotten to add his name, he didn't go.

He couldn't go to look at her, marrying a man she never loved, out of weariness and familial duty. He wanted to tell her he was sorry, but there had been no other choice.

He called her on her wedding day, and his voice was scratchy, because of distance, and desperate.

"I'm so sorry," he said.

"I know," she said after a moment. "You didn't mean to."

"I've always regretted that argument," he said, pressing on as if this was the last time he would ever speak to her. It felt that important.

"It's okay," she said.

"Best of luck," he said hollowly, hating to send his friend into a loveless marriage.

"Thank you, Li-kun," she said. He heard Sakura's voice in the background, and Tomoyo said goodbye and hung up. He stood there for a moment by the phone, searching for an alternative to what he had done, and finding none.

"Best of luck," he repeated. Surely Tomoyo would be all right. At least today she had Sakura at her side.