storypaint | Third Great War (guardians gen) *repost*

Comm: 50fantastic
Words: 827
Title: Third Great War
Prompt: 16. CCS. Kero and Ruby Moon plot...something. What happens to our poor unsuspecting Spinel and Yue?
Written for: suppis_tenshi
Genre: humor, gen
Rating/Warnings: G, no warnings
Disclaimer: Cardcaptor Sakura belongs to CLAMP. All fanfiction archived here is a derivative of canon material that is not my property. I do not profit from these writings. The opinions and actions expressed in these stories are not necessarily the views and beliefs of the original author or me.

Excerpt: At this time last year, the kitchen was full of pots and pans, and Nakuru wore one on her head when she was giving orders to the one unwilling private in her army, Spinelsun.

The first family reunion ended in a mess and a sound scolding. The second ended with the Great Cake War, and the third with the Second Great Cake War, courtesy of Ruby Moon. Sakura was ready to give up on her yearly visits with Eriol altogether, but he convinced her to come out for a visit one more time.

The first day, jet-lagged, Sakura retired to bed early. Surprisingly, Eriol noted, Ruby Moon seemed to be just fine. Even normal, for her. At this time last year the kitchen was full of pots and pans, including the one Nakuru wore on her head when she was giving orders to an unwilling private in her army (Spinelsun). When Sakura had begged off from an evening of catching up with Eriol for an evening of catching up on sleep, Nakuru had also retired. Or at least, disappeared into the depths of their cavernous home.

Two days of the week-long visit proceeded in this manner, with Nakuru's early disappearance. This time Eriol noticed something else strange.

"Where is Keroberos?" he asked. Sakura looked around, surprised. Yue was being his usual implacable self, waiting by her side, and Spinelsun was across the room studying a book Sakura had brought him from her father's stash. Kero-- and Ruby-- were nowhere to be seen.

"I don't know..." she said curiously. "I didn't let him pack the Game Boy... I'm surprised he's not here."

"Hmm," Eriol said. "Perhaps he and Ruby Moon are planning a takeover."

The two of them laughed, but Yue opened an eye and met Spinelsun's glance. They seemed to consider for a long while. Then the guardians left the room together.

"Think of it this way," Eriol said, when Sakura sighed. "At least they're getting along."

It was eerie how silent the mansion became. Occasionally one caught a glimpse of Kero as he flitted around the corner, glancing back and forth suspiciously; the quieter guardians were nowhere to be found. Eriol and Sakura tried to enjoy the respite, but they began to feel a little paranoid themselves.

On the last day of their visit, everything exploded. Actually, just the east wing of the mansion, in which Ruby Moon and Keroberos were cloistered. Eriol was never quite able to determine the exact cause or feature of the attack. Suffice it to say that it ended with three broken windows and a drawing room that was much more damp than it should have been.

Eriol and Sakura stood in the midst of the wreckage. Eriol laughed. The funny thing about it, which made Eriol laugh and Sakura stare at him, was that actually Ruby Moon and Keroberos hadn't been plotting anything at all.

They'd been playing poker, very quietly, a tournament with the top prize of five dollars. (The secrecy? Well, who wanted to play with the two best poker faces in the country?) Spinelsun and Yue had been taking the time to plan a counter-attack to whatever they thought Ruby and Kero were up to. Paranoid, they decided to launch it preemptively. And thus, the ruin of a deck of cards and several pieces of furniture.

The wind whipped through the windows, making Sakura shiver. A vein stood out on her head as she considered how much damage her guardian had done to Eriol's beautiful home. And Yue-- the better-behaved one-- no less. How out of character for him!

Eriol just laughed. "Now, can we agree to have a truce next year?" he said to the guardians. Sulkily they all nodded. Kero shook himself a little, shedding water and making the rest of them protest.

"Next year?" Sakura said. "Are you crazy, Eriol-kun? You won't have a house left next year!"

"Uncertainty is the spice of life," Eriol said cheerfully. "Though I'm sure our over-enthusiastic companions won't try anything like this again. Not after the snowball war I'm about to give them."

"What?" Ruby managed to say before the floor, eight inches deep in water, became eight inches deep in snow. Then a snowball hit her in the face.

Everyone turned to look at Yue. He lifted an eyebrow.

"This is what you're supposed to do with this stuff, isn't it?"

"Indeed," Eriol agreed, plastering one on Yue's pristine form, and then the world became very white.

An hour later, they were all collapsed on the floor, breathing hard. Sakura lifted her head from its place on Kero's side and looked at her watch.

"We have to be at the airport in an hour!" she said, panicking.

"No worries," Eriol said. He snapped his fingers and her suitcase appeared in his hand. He refused to hand it to her, promising to carry it out to the car like a true gentleman. He extended his empty hand to her to help her up.

"See you next year?" he asked. Sakura glanced around at the guardians, laying as though they'd fallen in battle. She smiled a little.

"See you next year."